Stellie Pearl's Thoughts......

I Keep Hoping That My Tomorrows Will Catch Up With Yesterday

Saturday, September 12, 2009



I started this blog because my memory is not as good as it used to be. I want to chronicle my life while I can still remember things. I am not totally senile - I used to pride myself on my great memory. Others were fascinated by it as well. My dear cousin Dawn would ask "What were you wearing on June 25th, 1983?" And I would tell her, astounding the others in our presence. Of course, it helps if you actually have photos of yourself on the day in question. Or kept a damn good diary, listing what outfit that you wore each day of your past....that is what kind of nerd I was growing up. Every day in my diary was a written inventory; what I wore, what I ate, who smiled at me. Ask me what I wore on August 6th, 1977...I can tell you!

This is me and Nono...Dad's side of the family is Italian. My Christening Day.

Well, there is no better place to start than the beginning, I suppose. My earliest memory...I was having a hissy fit in my crib when Mom put me down for a nap. I remember holding onto the bar, jumping up and down, screaming....watching my Mother's back retreat down the hallway. I still remember the bottoms of the boots she was wearing. They were some sort of snow boots, and the bottoms had deep ridges in them. I remember my tears, how hot my face felt. I am not quite sure of my age...I would guess maybe 2 or 3. My brother was born when I was 4, and this was definitely before he came along, because I was in the room that became his AND I was in a crib. Wild, huh?

~Me & Bro; his first birthday~
I had (kind of) accepted him by then.

Fast next memory is the day my brother came home from the hospital. I had stayed at a friend's house while Mom was in the hospital. I remember my Dad standing at my friend's front door. I came down their steep steps in black Mary Janes...I remember that because I was afraid I was going to slip and fall. Outside it was a beautiful fall day....sunny...lots of colored leaves. What I don't remember is my parents preparing me for this new person that was now in our lives. When we got home and I heard him make a small noise (I had not seen him yet) I perked up. "Was that a cat? Did you get me a cat?" I jumped up and down, excited beyond belief. "Say hi to your little brother..." I peered into the bassinet. "Can you take it back?" I asked. I do not remember their response. They probably laughed...I know that they thought it was hilarious as hell when he peed on me. Mom was changing his diaper...he peed straight up in the air and into my eye. From that day forward, I wanted him gone. My Mom still gets a kick out of remembering me watching her change his diaper for the first time. "What is that?" I pointed at his private part. "That is a penis," Mom said. "Do I have a penis?" I asked. "No, you have a vagina," she said. I thought about this for a minute, then in my most serious voice, with my most serious face told her "Penis and vagina....those sure are funny names for your bottom!"

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